man, i didn't even finish my poem... i started it yesterday and forgot all about it... let's see if I can finish it now
"yeah, I totally used a screen bean..."
A Deep Breath
stopping for a moment
Really taking time to breathe
getting all of it together
just to set my mind at ease
but it's only for a moment
cause there's so much to get done
every choice and actio matters
and their merit counts a ton
from the planning, from the worry
it feels good to take a break
and pretend i'm sipping lattes
or i'm lounging by a lake
as i play death cab for cutie
from my laptop and relax
and i veg out and i mellow
and survive this heart attack
i've been having, just to keep up
trying to keep my head afloat
no time for crying, or realizing
there's no more time for the remote
but as i sit here contemplating
all the work piled on the shelf
i am happy, appreciative
that i made time for myself
stopping for a moment
Really taking time to breath
getting all of it together
just to set my mind at ease
but it's only for a moment
cause there's so much to get done
i am honored still to do it
cause i've earned it; i'll take one [i suppose...]
yeah, that's how my week has been. hectic, but in a good way.... i think i'm going to take a nap.... i'm not quite sure what the objection would be... i don't have anything to f*ckin prove...
"i don't have to f*ckin impress you..."
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that's pretty interesting that i chose to honor my body's needs rather than socialize because i really wanted to do both [that was my attempt to try and engage in both activities], but i'd kind of felt this morning that it was going to be very soon before i eventually crashed. i'm old and not used to this level of activity...
No, but seriously... The need to rejuvenate is really important. I've been needing to do a post about this and even have the beginning parts of posts set up, but we often fail to realize what an impact it has on our ability to function when we just take the time out for ourselves to get some rest, let our minds rest and our bodies heal so that we can build the strength we need to fully maximize our potential and capacity to work.
Ironically, we were talking about maintenance in tech today, and i never even thought to make the correlation until this evening. Preventative maintenance, routine maintenance, diagnostics, calibration and so on or crucial procedures in making sure that any piece of machinery works well. Similarly, diet [preventative], studying [routine], checkups, both mental and physical[diagnostics], and exercise [calibration] and all sorts of rudimentary testing is absolutely necessary to ensure that we will be able to do all or a good portion of what we have set out to do.
Many people wait until there is a problem in one of those areas; particularly once they've been unleashed from home from the first time, before they ever look to attend to these areas, and I am no exception. I'd been making myself go to bed on time, due to medical reasons, but even still, my mind kept me in that mode of having to only get 6 hours of sleep a night. Which could be cool, but my diet isn't calibrated as well as it had been and I cram a lot of activities into a single day. In the past 72 hours my schedule has been like this, and this hasn't included coordinating office hours, downloading software, studying, panicking, library time, meals and so on.... I've had to get up every morning and set aside time, unless I can squeeze it in to coordinate my schedule [electronically... and then transfer to my calendar, since the software won't send reminders to my phone like i tried to program it to] so that I can just fit all of the hours into the day. Here is what the past few days have looked like:
Wednesday
9:30am math 115
1pm chinese 101
3pm tech 110
5:30pm private percussion lessons
- Thursday
- 8am pick up add form for afro latin percussio
- 9am breakfast
10am gstr 110
12pm turn in private lesson form/ add drop
1pm middle eastern festival
2pm counseling services
4:30pm labor assignment
8pm study chinese
8:30pm residence hall meeting
Friday
9:30am mth 115
1pm ch1 101
3pm tec 110
5:15pm grocery shopping
7pm suite meeting
10pm the underground
To my surprise, the only thing that didn't get done is the shopping and the underground thing and that was more or less due to scheduling conflicts and the fact that i crashed than anything else. I got everything else done despite the interruptions and did some amazing things to make sure that it got that way. Who else but me would have been like OMG I totally can't remember these chinese phrases.... since the dvd and the flash cards aren't working, let me download a few programs so that i can convert the files to mp3 files and upload them to my player and that way i can just walk around and recite them...? I'm just saying, that takes freakin ingenuity and dedication.
I am also struggling to figure out what to do about the voice recorder for my math class. Hopefull if I get an assignment or two ahead I won't miss anything else, but you never know. I rented one today for $8 and uploaded the lesson on my computer using audacity. I had never used it before, but it really helped me kill two birds with one stone. It's like 2:20 am and I've got a pilates core workout in the morning [well later]. the problem is, i'm not sleepy. i let one of my books to my classmates so i guess i could do one of the other assignments, after i make some tea. i'd rather do my math homework in the open air and sunday will be spent cramming. i tried to do my tech assignment right after class today, so that i wouldn't have to think about it this weekend, but i ended up having to email the professor for further clarification...
Does a turbine count as a turbine engine? Is there some other terminology for reciprocating pumps? The only resources in the library insert them as blurbs when talking about rotary pumps or microturbines [and even the larger ones] but i'm not entirely sure if that's the same thing [because it has fans], or if he actually wants me to write about an engine with pistons. then i read something about compressors, so i got a little mixed up. maybe it's in the book.... this is why it's always good to read ahead. it's not due until monday, but they scheduled me to work a double in food services on sunday [which is bullsh*t cause i had planned on using it as primarily a study day to give me the opportunity to take care of some logistical stuff today].
Anyway, there's this concert they're throwing from some group called "the sickest kids you know" or something. clearly i don't know who they are and am cool about skipping it. i think i'm gonna go check out the local coffee shop and hangout and try to get some work done. word on the street is that they do quite a bit of indie stuff there, so that could be fun to check out... i guess i'll tackle this writing assignment and see if i can find some material on power and mechanical systems for an hour or two. it'll be a few less things to worry about trying to cram into my weekend...
Quotes that could have gone with that picture: Which one would you have preferred?
- “I try to live what I consider a "poetic existence." That means I take responsibility for the air I breathe and the space I take up. I try to be immediate, to be totally present for all my work.”
Maya Angelou - “We are alone, with no excuses. That is the idea I shall try to convey when I say that man is condemned to be free. Condemned, because he did not create himself, yet, in other respects is free; because, once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.”
Jean-Paul Sartre - "With great power comes great responsibility"
Uncle Ben from Spiderman
Hit me back and let me know which one you like best....
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